Banzai gets down 'n' dirty
by bossbeaver
Summary: Every animal in the jungle knows that it is important to care about hygiene, whether they are prey or predators. Well, almost every animal. A Lion King Parody of the ppg episode "Down 'n' Dirty".


One day in the jungle, the animals were keeping the jungle tidy due to a storm that recently occurred. The ducks were picking up things that fell into the ponds, the elephants were picking up litter from the ground, and the giraffes were removing the litter that got caught in the trees. Pretty much all the animals in the jungle were busy restoring the jungle to its clean state and were taking pride in doing it as well. Well, almost all the animals.

While the other animals were cleaning, the three mischievous hyenas of the jungle, Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed, were busy chasing a wildebeest.

"It feels good to look for more meals after that storm that happened recently." Shenzi said as she was running.

"Definitely. And I feel pumped up and ready to take some tasty snacks down!" Banzai replied excitedly. Ed just smiled and laughed.

As the hyenas kept running and got closer to the wildebeest, Banzai went ahead of Shenzi and Ed and suddenly leapt towards the wildebeest and got onto its back. He then tried controlling the wildebeest by getting a hold of its horns. He succeeded, but only for a couple of seconds. After those seconds, the wildebeest successfully shook Banzai off, which resulted in the hyena landing in a puddle of mud. But, Banzai was determined to take that wildebeest down. He, now all covered in mud, got up and hid in a bush. Thinking that Banzai was already gone, the wildebeest went in front of the bush Banzai was hiding in and ate some grass from the ground. In seconds, Banzai leapt out of the bush and tackled the wildebeest. The two animals wrestled and after a minute, Banzai finally made the kill.

"Hey guys! I finally got us some lunch!" Banzai called out to Shenzi and Ed. The two other hyenas came over, congratulated Banzai on killing the wildebeest, and all three hyenas started eating on their new lunch. As they were eating, Shenzi started looking at her fur.

"I'm definitely gonna take a bath after this. I feel so dirty." Shenzi said with disgust at the end.

"What are you talking about? Being dirty is all part of the fun of getting us meals!" Banzai exclaimed.

"Hey. Just because we're predators doesn't mean we shouldn't care about personal hygiene."

"Hmph. Whatever." Banzai rolled his eyes at Shenzi. Ed just continued eating his part of the wildebeest.

After eating, the hyenas were on their way back to their cave. When they finally got to their cave, they noticed a deep pond next to the cave.

"Huh? This wasn't here before." Banzai said.

"This pond must have come along 'cuz of the storm." Shenzi reasoned. A smile then grew on her face. "Well, at least we can get clean sooner. Come guys! Last one in the pond is a rotten egg!"

Shenzi exclaimed as she ran towards the pond, did a cannonball, and went into the water. Ed followed. Soon, Shenzi and Ed had fun cleaning themselves in the pond and started splashing each other. Shenzi suddenly noticed that Banzai was not in the water.

"Come on, Banzai! The water's good!" Shenzi called out. However, Banzai frowned at her and Ed.

"Don't you know that only dumb losers take baths?!" Banzai angrily then passed his two friends and went inside the cave.

"I'm not dumb." Ed, with his ears drooping, said in his laughter language.

The next day, the hyenas were busy chasing down an ostrich. As the hyenas were running, the ostrich deeply inhaled and suddenly spat at the hyenas while running. Luckily, the hyenas stopped and dodged the ostrich's spit.

"This is going to get disgusting". Shenzi noted.

"It sure is!" Banzai, apparently still covered in mud from the other day, added enthusiastically.

He then pushed Shenzi and Ed aside and resumed going after the ostrich. During the chase, the ostrich was spitting at Banzai multiple times and Banzai ended up covering himself in ostrich spit. He suddenly tripped and fell down in the process. But, none of that stopped Banzai from wanting to take down the ostrich. As he got up, Banzai licked the spit that was covering his face, pulled his tongue back in, spat out the ostrich spit, and did a wide, mischievous grin. He started running very quickly and managed to catch up to the ostrich and went in front of it. In seconds, Banzai pounced on the ostrich and made the kill.

Banzai called over his two friends and showed them their new meal for the day.

"Alright guys! Let's eat". Banzai happily said as he started munching on the dead ostrich. Shenzi and Ed, however, did not seem to be in the mood for eating. Instead, they held their noses and looked at each other uncomfortably.

"Is it just me, or does Banzai stink?" Shenzi whispered to Ed.

A while later, the hyenas went home. To Banzai's shock, Shenzi and Ed went back into the pond to wash themselves.

"What are you guys doing? Don't you know that you're just gonna get dirty again tomorrow? Ugh!" Banzai whined and went into the cave. Shenzi and Ed just looked at each other in confusion.

When night time came, the hyenas were inside the cave minding their own business. Unfortunately for Shenzi and Ed, they spent most of the time trying to keep a distance from Banzai due to his smell. In response, Banzai just kept a negative look. After a while, Shenzi decided to put her foot down.

"Banzai, it's one thing to care about your own hygiene, but it can get bad if your hygiene affects other guys. Now, I'm being serious. Go take a bath outside! Now!" Shenzi said firmly.

"Ugh! What's the sudden interest in my personal hygiene, anyway? I'm not taking a bath and that's that!" Banzai angrily replied. "If you don't like it, kick me out!"

The next thing he knew, Banzai literally got kicked out by Shenzi.

"Fine! Who needs them anyway!" Banzai said to himself as he left the cave for the night.

The next morning, Banzai was chasing a gazelle all by himself.

"I may be in a falling out with my friends. But, at least I still have my muscles!" He said in his mind as he was running.

Suddenly, the gazelle made a sharp turn, which caused the hyena to crash into a bush in front of him. Banzai then found himself face to face with a skunk inside the bush. In seconds, the skunk turned around and sprayed its awful stench at the hyena. Banzai reacted by getting out of the bush quickly and running far away from it.

"Well, that didn't go so well." He said to himself.

Later during the day, Banzai was on his way to Rafiki's tree. He was hoping that the wise baboon would talk some sense into his friends in order to excuse himself from ever taking a bath.

When Banzai arrived at the tree, he knocked on the trunk. Rafiki suddenly appeared and went down the tree to greet the hyena.

"Well, if it isn't one of the jungle's most mischievous three." The baboon greeted. "Besides the obvious, what can I do fo-" Rafiki said right before he covered his nose and mouth. "In Mufasa's name, what is that smell?!" He said in a muffled manner.

"Sorry to disturb you, old monkey. I was just wondering if you could talk some sense into my friends. It's just that they overreacted when I said that I didn't want to clean myself up and Shenzi kicked me out of the cave. I can't believe my friends would do that!" Banzai explained to Rafiki, who was already holding his nose.

"For once, I believe your friends are right! You're as stinky as expired tofu! I highly recommend you take a bath before you drive away anyone else off with that odor!" Rafiki said quickly and went back in his tree in a fast pace. He then hung a "Do Not Disturb" sign outside the tree. Banzai, not getting Rafiki's point, just rolled his eyes.

"Ah. Who needs him." He said.

After his disappointing meeting with Rafiki, Banzai went to certain parts of the jungle where he could spend some quiet time by himself. But, everywhere he went, the animals, who were at the places he went to, ran away from the hyena due to his foul smell. Soon enough, the animals became greatly annoyed by Banzai's smell and complained to Zazu, the jungle administrator. He, too, was greatly annoyed by the smell.

"Yes! Yes! I smell it too! Do you think I'm blind?! Of course, I smell it!" Zazu said loudly to the animals. He then turned to his assistant, Gopher. "Something must be done!"

Late in the evening, Banzai, who was still going around the jungle, noticed that there were no animals around. "Hey. Where did everybody go?"

"There HE is!"

Banzai turned around to see Zazu accompanied by an angry mob of animals holding torches and pitch forks. The hyena took three steps back and looked confused. Zazu was the first to go up to the hyena and speak.

"Banzai. Good thing we found you." Zazu said formally." As the jungle administrator, I feel that it is my sworn duty to tell you that…YOU STINK! YOU SMELL! YOU REAK! You're stinking up the whole jungle. So either take a bath, or take a hike!" He told Banzai in a strict manner.

The other animals agreed with the hornbill.

"Enough talk!" A zebra said.

"It's bath time!" A monkey shouted.

Pretty soon, the whole angry mob started shouting things at the hyena. Banzai, who knew the whole jungle was about to shred him to pieces, scrammed. Subsequently, the mob started chasing him down. Banzai, with a worried look, ran as fast as he could to get away from the mob. Fortunately for him, he saw a huge tree stump and hid behind it. Once he was hidden, the mob lost sight of him. While the animals were wondering where the hyena went, Banzai slowly crept away, staying hidden in the process.

Minutes later, Banzai was sitting at the edge of a cliff facing the ocean, pondering to himself.

"First my friends, and now the whole jungle. What does being clean have to do with being a predator anyway?" He said to himself. Banzai suddenly frowned and threw his arms up. "Ugh! Whatever! Who needs those guys anyway?! As long as I can still hunt for prey and stuff, I ain't ever comin'clean!"

As Banzai was still being upset about everyone's reaction to his smell, he suddenly noticed a certain meerkat and warthog duo eating worms from a distance. Banzai, forgetting at what he was upset at, grinned mischievously.

"I may not be so successful at catching those guys, but I love seeing their scared looks!" He thought to himself.

"Looks like we've really hit the gold mine this time, Pumbaa. I've never seen so many worms in one place!" Timon said happily to his warthog friend.

"Definitely!" Pumbaa agreed.

While they were eating, Pumbaa noticed a bush shaking.

"Pssst. Timon! I think something is inside that bush that's alive." Pumbaa said.

When Timon turned around to see the shaking bush, he and Pumbaa suddenly saw Banzai leap out of the bush and position himself in front of the two.

"Surprise!" Banzai exclaimed. Timon and Pumbaa started to shake nervously.

"It's one of those hyenas again and this time it's the tough one! C'mon Pumbaa! Move it!" Timon shouted as he got on Pumbaa's back. Pumbaa then ran away for his (and Timon's) life. Banzai subsequently went after the meerkat and warthog.

While the chase between Banzai, and Timon and Pumbaa was going on, the meerkat and warthog suddenly sensed an unpleasant smell.

"Timon, I know what you're thinking. It is not me this time." Pumbaa told Timon.

"I know! It's the hyena! You better bring out the gas masks, Pumbaa." Timon replied. Subsequently, Pumbaa pulled out two gas masks and gave one to Timon. The two friends then put the gas masks over their faces.

This caught Banzai's attention. Banzai then stopped the chase by telling Timon and Pumbaa to stop running.

"Hey, wait a minute! What are you wearing?" Banzai asked the two.

"Um…Gas masks. What else could they be?" Pumbaa answered.

"Why are you wearing gas masks?"

Timon decided to answer that question. What he said really ticked Banzai off. "Oh…I don't know. Maybe because…YOU STINK!"

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!"

Banzai suddenly reacted by punching the air with his fists and grunting loudly. Since he could not take the complaints anymore, he decided to give in to what everybody wanted him to do.

"Alright! I'll do it! I'll take that stupid bath!" He said loudly in an 'I give up' tone.

Early during the next morning, Banzai found himself in the pond Shenzi and Ed bathed in. This time, Shenzi and Ed were in charge of making sure Banzai was squeaky clean. Once they made sure Banzai stayed in the water, Shenzi and Ed pulled out some sponges, applied some liquid soap onto the sponges, and used the sponges to scrub Banzai all over. As for Banzai, he showed a look of dislike as he was being bathed. But, he knew that in order to get everyone to shut up about his hygiene, he had to go through it even though he did not like it. Once Shenzi and Ed were finished scrubbing their reluctant friend, they dunked Banzai in the water (for rinsing) and pulled him out of the pond.

Once Banzai's bath was over, Ed wrapped Banzai with a towel.

"See buddy? Don't you feel better now that you're all squeaky clean?" Ed asked in his laughter language. Banzai, although now clean, was still acting grumpy.

"Just shut up, Ed. I only took this stupid bath so I could hunt for prey again." Banzai replied coldly.

Shenzi crossed her arms and looked straight at her stubborn friend. "You know Banzai, you may be clean, but your attitude still stinks."

THE END


End file.
